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SCRANTON, Pa. - A precocious five-year-old is stealing America's hearts and is ready for live television. Apparently.

Young Noah Ritter was at the Wayne County Fair in Pennsylvania when a reporter from WNEP-TV asked him to describe a new roller coaster. What happens next is viral video gold. Apparently.

Dear KSDK decision-makers, hire this kid. I, for one, welcome our new child overlords. Apparently.

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